NEW BLOG ADDRESS!

Hi guys,
I am in the process of creating something super cool.  This blog will be located on a new website that is under construction.

If you would like to take a look around (I have done a couple new blog posts on it) you can, but remember that this is an unfinished site, so many of the pages won't have anything on them yet!

What you can do is click on this link to go directly to the blog, and sign up with your email so that you get each new post.  Be sure to comment on any of the posts by clicking on the little "comments" or "no comments"  words.

Enjoy, and please give me any feedback you have on the site.  I am trying to incorporate all the feedback I get to make this the coolest TKD site ever!!

Blog :    www.taekwondospirit.com/blog/

Happy Birthday To Me!

I turned 44 at 1:07 a.m. this morning.  Missed being a Valentine by an hour, but my mom would tell you that I am her's anyway.  :)

I love my birthday.  Kind of a crazy love that I have had for as long as I can remember.  Since I have been working, I have taken my birthday off, and so today, I took off from my normal work day and celebrated me.

I had thought about going for a run this morning.  The thought crept into my mind last night as I was planning what I was going to do to make my day the best.  Starting out my day with a run was something I did for many, many, many years, until I had kids and sleep became higher on my priority list.  But nowadays I have to be up at 6:30a.m. anyway to see my middle schooler off so I thought maybe after Danielle was also out the door that I would go.  But another thought occurred to me and I asked Dani if she wanted to go for a birthday run with me.  Everything sounds better with the word birthday in front of it, even running.

Much to my delight, she gave me a very enthusiastic "Yes!"  Dani is going to start a program called Girls On The Run in a few weeks, so she is thinking about this running thing anyway.  Well out the door we went and it was so beautiful and sunny this morning, just for my birthday!  The run I do is about 2 miles long.  It is the run I have been doing for a while, just to keep running.  Nothing hard, nothing stressful, but I can say I went for a run.  Danielle and I started off down the road and met the trail head at about a quarter mile...off onto the Cabin John Trail we went.  About a minute onto the trail she told me that her ankle hurt, so we stopped and walked.  After three attempts and failures to get her jogging again I felt a little frustration brewing in me.  I wanted to RUN!

Then something nice happened and I relaxed.  I remembered that my nine year old had only done this running thing once before and wasn't as type A as I was about it.  I turned around to look at her, about to use my "encouraging" voice once more, and shut my mouth.  I smiled to myself and stopped and waited for her to catch up with me.  "Do you want to go in front?" I asked.  "Sure", she said and she scooted around me and the dog (who was very glad we decided to walk) and led the way through the woods.  

We walked the rest of the loop, talked about random things, listened to at least five different kinds of bird songs and one woodpecker knocking, and laughed about how her camp counselor calls poison ivy "the fuzzy vines."  (Not such a funny thing to someone who doesn't know what "fuzzy vines" are!)

My birthday "run" was the best!  So were my birthday pancakes that she made me when we got home!  And the day is still young!  A little birthday taekwondo tonight with some kind of birthday chocolate afterward, and the recipe for amazingly wonderful birthday will be complete!
:)
What do you like to do to celebrate your birthday?

Kicking People We Know

One of my taekwondo classmates was struggling the other night.  "I have a problem with kicking people I know," she emailed to me after class.

I am pretty sure we all struggle with this in class.  We don't want to hurt each other.  Yet, we have all been hurt (some broken) and survived to kick again.  And probably most of us have hurt someone without meaning to.  Hell, we picked a combat sport folks.  We picked it for a reason.  And we keep doing it for a reason.  And I am not stopping any time soon.

There is probably too much complicated psychology behind this to even try to think about explaining why those of us who practice martial arts do what we do, and love it.  But I am going to give my own baggage a crack tonight, in hopes that I might help some of my comrades.

I did not ever learn how to fight as a girl growing up.  Thankfully I never really needed those skills, although I remember the time Tammy smeared paste all over my favorite green sweatshirt in kindergarten and had I known how to punch back then, I may have practiced.  My mom was eighteen when she married my dad who was twenty five.  My mom addressed confrontation by obeying those who ruled the roost and by trying to make them happy, including her father and then her husband.  My dad ruled the roost so I learned to shut up and disappear when I needed to.  I never learned to speak up for myself, stick up for myself or fight for what I needed or thought was right.  I learned that doing those things was shameful and that following the rules was safer.  I would never do or say anything if I thought it would make someone angry or upset.  If I did it felt really, really bad.  Hurting someone physically wasn't even on my radar then.  I would have rather died than hurt someone.

Fast forward to my thirty eighth year of life, married with two kids of my own, Jonathan who was five and Danielle who was three at the time.  I was about to embark on the taekwondo journey without really knowing what it was I was getting into.  The universe has a way of giving us what we need sometimes.  I think you know what I mean.  Sometimes we are given opportunities to heal, grow and transform ourselves and they can be disguised as all sorts of things.  Mine wore a crispy white uniform tied with a black bow, was a man of few words but knew how to teach us how to fight, in more ways than one.

The longer I practiced the more passionate I became about the way of kicking and punching.  I did feel stronger, more flexible and in great shape, but the thing that I felt that overwhelmed me the most was a mix between confidence and indomitable spirit.  This feeling trumps the physical fighting skills I have learned.  It helps me in every part of my life, not just in class.

The only thing about training with this new family of mine, is that the longer I practice the more amazing friends I make.  I have known some of my classmates for over six years now.  They are my friends.  And some nights I have a problem with kicking people I know too.  I don't want to hurt anyone.  I would rather die sometimes.  That old feeling comes back...don't make anyone mad, don't hurt anyone, stay quiet, stay invisible.  Problem is that doing that has a cost.  It is a heavy layer of crap that covers up my spirit.  And at my age (44 next week!) that cost is too high.  I have spent a lot of time uncovering, healing and transforming myself so that my spirit can shine.  I am able to live with purpose and joy and nothing, nothing can take that away from me at this point.  So I practice kicking, and I enjoy training hard, knowing that my purpose is not to hurt anyone, but to keep shining.

I picked a combat sport (sorry mom) and I know there will be times I may be hurt or hurt someone unintentionally.  To continue the fight of my life, to be me, to live with passion and joy, I will need training partners who are willing to kick to the head, to show me what I am made of, to help me be the best I can be.  To every one of you in class, thanks for doing that, for being a friend, and for sharing this crazy passion with me.

Here's to kicking each other, for each other, with as few injuries as possible...
Laura

PS.  One of the rudest awakenings I had a few years ago when I decided to spar in one of my first tournaments was that the competitors I would be up against had absolutely no problems hurting me, by kicking to the head.  Gheeeeezzzz Louise, that was a lesson learned the hard way.  To this day I hesitate about sparring in tournaments because of that.  The only way I will do that again is if I feel prepared, physically (because my partners in class are helping me train hard) and mentally.  I am working on both of those things...

What are you all working on?  Give me a few comments guys, make me feel the love.  :)

The Voice of the Fuzzy Pants

On rare occasion I get funky about exercise and that voice in my head says, "Wouldn't you rather just put your jammies on sit on your butt and rest?"  This past week I said yes to that voice.  I had a good reason, an injury, that was making it easy for me to listen to that voice, thinking I was doing the right thing by resting it and taking it easy.  So I did, and it was okay for a bit, until Monday night, when the voice showed up again, "Wouldn't you rather just put your jammies on..." but this time another voice showed up.  (By this time I am sure you are starting to worry about the voices in my head, but don't).

The new voice was trying hard, struggling to be heard.  "Just go to class, you will feel better afterward, and if you don't go you will feel guilty and bad all week."  "You can just take it easy in class and make sure you don't hurt yourself."  Hmmm...  "Jammies!!" one voice shouted.  "Get your uniform on!" the other one protested.

So I actually went and changed into my jammies.  Ahhhh, fuzzy pants, you feel so good.  One more night of sitting on my butt won't hurt.  But there was something wrong...something inside of me that felt so bad about that decision wasn't letting it go.  Normally once I actually get the fuzzy pants on, that is it, done, no matter what voices appear at that point, they already lost.  But this time, something else fought hard.  So I went back into the bedroom and despite the nagging, "Ugh" feeling I had, I took off the pants and put on my uniform.  Through the continued thoughts of my couch, I put on my socks and tied up my shoes, and grabbed my keys and walked out the door.  I started the car and the voice interrupted "It's not too late, go back, the fuzzy pants are waiting!"

Class was spectacular, as usual.  My injury felt much better, especially after I got going, warmed up and the blood was flowing.  Helicopter kicks were feeling good.  And even better than that, I was smiling.  On the outside and the inside.  Whoever was fighting for me was victorious.  Thank goodness.  I like that girl.  

I know that it is okay to rest, especially if I have been injured and am in pain.  I know how important rest is to healing and recharging yourself.  But this was different.  This was that way we get that is no good for us, keeps us from reaching our goals, keeps us from acting in a way that best serves the big picture we have for our health and happiness.  Knowing I can overcome that voice, even when it overpowers all my other thoughts, by taking some action and "doing" despite what it says, is key.  The fuzzy pants will have to wait, I need some taekwondo.

What Do You Love?

Yes, what, not who.  What do you love to do?  What, when you are in the middle of doing it, immerses you in the moment to the degree that all other thoughts are wiped clean out of your mind?  Make a list of these things.  If you don't have more than one, start your list with one thing.  If you have many, you are blessed!

What, when you are in the middle of doing it, makes you light up inside and outside, forces a crazy smile onto your face that you can't get rid of, and lights a fire inside of you that is so bright it shines on everyone around you?  What is that thing you are thinking of right now, that maybe you wish you were doing as you are reading this, and you smile just thinking about it?

Passions, my friends, are what these things are.  They are what make life sweet and juicy and they are what, when you find them, make you think there must be a purpose to this amazing life we are living.  Life is good.  And life is magical in the middle of passion.

So how are you pursing yours?  Are you pursuing yours?  Do you know what they are?  Start with something little (or big) and go do it, in whatever capacity you can.  Make time for it and let it nourish your soul.  Let it take over, get addicted to it.  Be grateful for it and imagine that through it you are saving the world.

Just Red

So at a recent get together with some of my taekwondo classmates I over heard something I thought was interesting.  When asked what belt they were, many of my friends were saying "Oh I am just a red belt."

:(

JUST A RED BELT????

Really now, you need to know that getting to the red belt takes a lot of practice, determination, perseverance and dedication.  Not everyone makes it to the red belt.  In the six years I have been practicing, I have watched people drop out at various stages for various reasons.  When you are promoted to your red belt you are in a preparation stage for the black belt.  You will focus on what you need to learn for the next bit of time, and believe me, take the time, you will need it!  Enjoy every bit of red!  It goes so fast and you have heard it before, it is about the journey, not the destination...

So today I want all you red belts (and every other color for that matter) to be totally proud of what you have accomplished.  I am proud to know you, to train with you, and to be sharing this awesome sport with you!

Wishing you great kicks!
Laura

Decide What Your Life is About

"If you don't decide what your life is about, it defaults to what you spend your days doing."
Robert Brault

So pursue your passions every day in some small way.  Take an action toward your dreams.  Love a lot.  Forgive readily.  Enjoy your journey.  Keep your body and mind busy with healthy things.  Do more taekwondo...or knitting, or cooking, or soccer, or reading, or...

If your job sucks and and you are just making a living, make the most of where you are with what you have and make connections.  Put some energy into that one person who you seem to jive with.  And spend the rest of your moments imagining the best, most exciting and fulfilling job...imagine waking up in the morning totally jazzed to go to work because it feels like play.  Feel the emotions of it like you already have it.  Fake it a little if you have to.

What is getting in the way of you deciding what your life is about?  And what will you do about it?

TGIT (yes, Thursday is just as good as any other day for a miracle)

Learning Something New

The kids and I went to taekwondo class on Thursday night after a long holiday break.  Class was awesome as usual, we did way too many push ups though.  Jonathan and I began learning our first black belt form, Kwang-Gae.  Master Holloway showed us the first fourteen moves, if my count is correct, of the form and it was awesome.  They are all awesome, but what was even more exciting to me was that we were learning something new after a year or two of perfecting Choong Moo, our red belt form.  It had been a long time since we had learned a new move, or kick or form.  Jonathan and I went through the new moves of the form over and over again, letting our bodies get used to the new rhythm and patterns.  It was fantastic.

It is nice to practice in our comfort zones, easier really.  The moves and kicks and forms we had practiced for our black belt test for the last many years became familiar and we worked on perfecting them, getting them into our body memory, and then fine tuning the details.  The more comfortable you are with a move or pattern, the less you "think" about it and just do it.  Your body takes over.

Getting out of the comfort zone feels uneasy at first.  A little threatening.  Awkward.  And it is just what we need to grow.  Nobody learns and grows in their comfort zone.  Being outside of your comfort zone demands more focus, presence, and also openness to what you are learning.

I smiled to myself on Thursday night because I felt strangely like I did in my very first taekwondo class six years ago...like I loved it!  Did then, and do today.  Can't wait to keep learning and sharing and teaching what I have learned.

What new thing would you like to learn?  What is stopping you?

Out With The Old, In With The New, and Keep What is Working...

New Year's day is my favorite holiday of the year!  There is something cool about being able to wipe the slate clean (if you need to) and start fresh.  I enjoy reflecting on my past year, so every year I sit down with my calendars and do a little journaling recap of the events and happenings of the year for myself and my family.  It is interesting to look at the year as a whole and realize all we accomplished and sometimes wonder how we did it all.  Sometimes I look back and think "oh, I forgot about that!" and some of the events make me sad.  All in all, I enjoy the process and it ultimately moves me toward my vision for the year ahead, which also becomes part of my journaling.

I lay out a plan of the areas and details of my life that I want to put my energy into and write my dreams out on paper.  What unfolds from there always depends on where I choose to put my positive energy.  


I said I like the idea of wiping the slate clean and what I have come to realize is that we can do that every morning when we wake up if we want to.  We have the power to change the plan by changing the goals and changing the choices we make.  We can actually do that any moment we choose, not just when we wake in the morning.

So part of my plan for 2012 is to keep and expand on what is working for me.  I have a goal of staying open to new ideas so that I can evolve and create a life that continues to be the fullest, best expression of who I am.  My purpose is to teach this, to whoever will listen.  2012 is about teaching what I know and soaking up all there is to still learn so I can keep teaching.

I believe that we are here on the planet to connect with others.  We connect in many different ways in all of our daily interactions.  We teach, we learn, we listen, we care, we love.  One of the most fulfilling ways to connect is by living in our own passions and being an expression of that to those we connect with.  That whole process is a process of healing.  And it is part of what I want to help people do.

I HAVE SOME EXCITING GOALS FOR 2012, MEANT TO SHARE WITH YOU!  I SO HOPE YOU WILL JOIN ME AS I CONTINUE TO LEARN, HEAL AND TEACH...

Be on the lookout for:

"Living, Healing and Taekwondo" my first book, coming out soon!!

The Healing Moves Workshop - Saturday January 28, 2012 - Info and registration on the website!  And look it up on Facebook!

The Therapeutic Exercise Class - Ongoing on Tuesdays, 12:30pm to 1:30pm at the Carderock Club

Plus some other cool healing resources on the website - in the works!!

www.bodyworksptonline.com

email:  bodyworkspt@comcast.net or call me:  240.328.6073

Happy, Healthy, Joyous New Year to all of you!!

Laura

Happy Holidays!

I want to wish you all a fantastic holiday break.  I am grateful to have a rest - it has been an incredible year/month/week!

I would like to share with you the last chapter of the book I have written called "Living Healing and Taekwondo" (yes the blog title).  It is a tale of the black belt test and I hope you enjoy reading it.  I am looking very forward to sharing the whole book with you very soon!  This last chapter is titled "Chapter One".  See you in a week or so everyone!

Chapter One

What if you considered every day a beginning?  How would you start your journey?

The chapters of Living, Healing and Taekwondo that you have just read were written before December 17, 2011.  This last chapter, that I am calling Chapter One, is my best tale of the black belt test, written on Sunday December 18th (except for the first journal entry), so that I could remember the details.  I have been waiting excitedly to write this chapter, to finish this book with a story of triumph, and a result that comes from healing, dedication, love and passion.   This is a chapter that is a beginning, not an end...

Saturday December 17, 2011  7:10 a.m.

I have been thinking that I should feel different, be different after this test somehow.  I know better.  What I do or achieve is not who I am.  So I am stuck with a feeling of why does this matter?  Not does it matter, but why, cuz it matters!  Because even though the things we do and achieve and the roles we play are not who we are, we serve our highest purpose through them.  So that is why.  I found something that by expressing myself through it has allowed me to live in passion which is the best expression of myself I can give to the world.  I love this stuff and it matters to me which means it benefits others.  That might be the only reason we ever need.  

Today is going to be a great day.  I love you Jonathan and am proud beyond words to be by your side today.

Six and a half hours of magnificently intense, excruciating, fantastic, fighting, love, determination, and family.  These are some mediocre words to start you off with to describe the amazing experience I had yesterday.  It was everything I had hoped for with a couple extra surprises.  I can’t stop thinking about it.  Images and sounds of the day keep running through my brain, playing themselves over and over and I don’t get tired of it.  I am re-feeling every hug I got yesterday today.  I have smiled ten times over when I re-live the cheer that went up in that room when Master Holloway announced that Jonathan and I were now first degree black belts.  My eyes tear up every time I think about the moment my son, in pure let down happiness, buried his head in my arm for a hug and burst into tears.  Yeah, buddy, I know, I feel the same way.  

I want to tell you everything, so I think I will.  

Our friend Peter from class picked Jonathan and I up at the house so we could all ride together to the test.  I thank you Peter, because I am now not sure if my legs would have been able to “gas” and “brake” for the way home.  It was marvelous to have the company on the drive as that period of time in past tests always seems to be the absolute worst as far as pre-test anxiety for me.  So we drove and talked and I was nicely distracted from the way my stomach felt.  And I will give you a hint, stomach - not good, had to force breakfast down and could only eat half of my planned super power lunch.  

Peter having earlier admitted to me that he was equally paranoid about being to the dojang on time, got us there perfectly early.  Thank you again Peter.  Big sigh, we are here, on time.  

I had brought my iPod so I could listen to my taekwondo mix for some pumping up action.  I normally do this in my car on the way to a test so nobody has to listen to me sing Van Halen at the top of my lungs.  Since I had a ride this time, that wasn’t going to work so I listened to “Jump” and “Dynamite” and a few other good songs while Jonathan and I sat and stretched and warmed ourselves up.  It was good.  Then more people started arriving (after the anally early people came the normal on time people) and I put Van Halen away to join the rest of my friends for some nervous warm up chatter.  I watched as all of our friends came in to join us, feeling happy as I saw each familiar face and smile, the comrades who would do this thing with us today.  

“Line up” we finally heard, and formed rows of four across the room.  I think there were nineteen of us total and later found out that two of them would not be staying to complete the test so in the end there were seventeen. “Class!” “Cha rutt!, kyung yet!”.  Master Lee did a fantastic, loudest I have ever heard “cha rutt, kyung yet”.  I actually had a quick goose bumps reaction in that moment.  Love it.   We warmed up with kicks and then got down to business.  Nerves have diminished 90% at this point.  Getting physical always helps.  

Basic kicks had to be in time with the group.  We didn’t do a good enough job the first go around so he split us in two groups and did it again.  Most of us are in a full sweat at this point.  Forms started with Jonathan who was called out by himself.  In random order (harder) he was asked to perform each one.  If he faltered or messed up he repeated it. This might have been the first mom reaction I felt inside of me, just wanting him to feel good about what he was doing.  I mentally followed each move of his forms and knew when he was off but watched proudly as he picked up where he needed to and kept going.  I could hear two others behind me as we all whispered “that’s it” when he would get himself back on track.  Realizing then that I wasn’t the only “mom” in the room and in that moment I felt the family that stood around me, that was there for me, and my son.  Fantastic, indescribable feeling.  I couldn’t help being a mom, but I had incredible back up last night.  

Then it was my turn to do the same.  I had to get my side kicks to stick.  Eventually most of them did.  Then forms as a group.  The black belts were called to the side to watch the rest of us perform each form as a group.  They each had one of us red belts to watch and give feedback to, and then we repeated the form to see if we could fix what we were told needed fixing.  Thank you Master Lee for all the tips.  Then each of the red belts had to perform their highest form, Choong Moo, solo.  The black belt group then did all of their forms as a group.  We did a lot of forms.  One of my favorite parts of a test is watching the black belt group as they complete, I don’t know, at least nine more forms past the nine that the red belts know, and do it in sync for the most part.  It is beautiful to watch, like a dance.  It is hard to believe that a person can remember that many forms, one after the other, without missing a beat, but this group does just that.  Love it!

Not sure if I will remember the order of events perfectly at this point, but I think one steps were next.  There are ten one step maneuvers that we (some of us) have memorized.  Those who haven’t are led by those of us who have, which is a nice way to teach them.  I had worked on these and had them all down.  That was not the case on the last test.  Brett grabbed me as his partner which was great because we had practiced together in class the same week, and off we went through each ten.  

“Get your pads on” is what we heard next.  Sparring might be the hardest part of the test.  No, for sure it is because by this time we are getting a little tired and sparring takes a mind body effort.  It takes all you have left.  And you have to find something left because about half way through sparring you could swear there is nothing.  Not one more kick left.  I wondered at one point if my foot was going to lift off the ground one more time, never mind actually kick, above the knee.  

We sparred in pairs as a group, rotating through, for a long time.  I think those are two minute rounds.  We line up in two rows facing each other.  We take up the entire length of the room at this point and have to deal with sparring our partner and staying out of the way of our neighbors kicks too.  I am pretty sure I stepped on and/or kicked someone that was not my partner at least three times.  Then he calls out a few pairs at a time, maybe three pairs, and that group goes.  Jonathan did this for a while.  And this is when the mom in me had a hard time.  I knew that this part of the test would be difficult, for him, for me, for all of us.  And it was fine.  He fought his little heart out, sometimes through tears, at one point through sobs, and then rallied and fought pretty fricken hard in the end with some nice kiups.  The entire room cheered him on.  The entire room folks!  Family.  Thank you guys and gals for cheering on my son like he was yours.  You are all first class in my book.  Thank you to those who gave me a look of recognition during those moments too.  A look that said, “I know how you are feeling and it will be okay”.

As we went through the rotation of sparring Jonathan and I were not allowed to be out of the line up.  So no breaks.  This is tough.  I felt sick and was hurting in several places that I can’t remember enough to list right now.  And I kept going, finding the something left.  Even though you are feeling the pure physical exhaustion at this point you realize that a lot of this is in your mind.  You have to stop thinking “tired” and figure out some other thing to tell yourself.  “This will be over soon”, “only two minutes left”, “this is all in my head”, “this is your time to shine”, “find what you have left”, are all things I used.  It mostly worked.  The support from my friends helped tremendously.  Thank you Diego for the “pace yourself” speech.  I knew that, but wasn’t doing it.  To all of you who encouraged me with your words, thank you very much.  

Sparring continued with first Jonathan and then me having to take on the entire group of black belts, one by one, for one minute rounds, no stopping.  This is when you really think, “I got nothing left” but have to find some anyway.  There are really very few appropriately descriptive words for how proud I felt about my son during this time.  I am going to repeat myself now, this is hard.  It is also what makes you be able to stand up at the head of the room at the end and know you just earned that beautiful black belt you are sporting.  If you had doubts about whether or not you earned it before, you do not have any doubts left after this round of sparring.  You just don’t.  It is magnificent.  And you are sparring among the cheers, encouragement and suggestions of your friends, who have been there.  You know they know how you feel.  You know they want you to succeed.  You know they need you to succeed, that your success is theirs.  

And then it is over.  

And then you have to break a f*&%%!  board.  Or six in my case.  Because that is what my little brain came up with the week before the test.  Actually it was supposed to be seven (ending with a hammer fist technique that I had never had the nerve to try before) but I took the seventh board out of the routine at the last minute, out of sheer, oh my god what have I done, panic.  I was so sick to my stomach at this point that for a moment I had a thought that I might have to lie down.  I rallied, ate a Gu gummy thing or two and the slight increase in blood sugar might have helped.  The sickness passed.  Thank you God.  I am pretty sure a few people talked to me during this waiting period and I just want to say to them now that I apologize if I said something totally spacy or if I did not answer you at all!  

Breaking is my other favorite part of taekwondo.  There is something so totally cool about being able to do this.  Being able to break (six different boards) at the end of a black belt test is beyond totally cool.  It is ridiculous.  Fantastically ridiculous that we can make ourselves find the power, accuracy and speed it takes to break those boards, at the very end of a test when we are completely spent.  Completely spent.  

Jonathan went before me with a back kick to three boards, a first attempt for him.  He got it on the third try.  My routine included a reverse turning kick to one board, a step side kick to two boards and a jump side to three boards.  The first two were a breeze.  I couldn’t break the three boards with my jump side so I changed my mind and switched to a jump back kick and broke them on the second try!  There is just nothing like this.  You really ought to try this some time.  We watched each of our colleagues finish their awesome breaking routines and cheered after each one.  Their success was mine.  Somehow the energy is connected in that room.  Everyone is quiet in anticipation of a break, feeling the focus of the student, feeling it in themselves and also feeling the triumph when they succeed.  You get to feel your own, and then you get to feel it sixteen more times.  Love it!

Time to clean up the floor, clear the boards, sweep up the tiny wood shards and line up.  We were then asked to sit down.  A collective moan was shared as we all managed to get our cramped up, bruised bodies down to the floor.  It was surmised that the average age in that room, if you took out Jonathan at eleven and Maggie at seventeen, was probably forty five years.  The moaning was a give away.  I will tell you that this is an especially in shape group of forty to sixty year olds, that will be forever young by continuing this sport.  

As Master Holloway called them the red belts each moved to the front of the room and received their stripes.  The black belt degree promotions were next.  Three of my friends from the Y received their second degree promotion.  There was a fourth degree promotion, two fourth degree third class  promotions, and then a pause.  Jonathan, me and Lois were left.  Master Holloway called Jonathan up to the front and shook his hand while he talked to him about  this day being a beginning of the next phase for him.  Love it!  And then I was called up to stand next to my son.  A moment I have dreamt about.  It felt like I thought it would, like one of the most incredible moments of my life.  Master Holloway announced our promotion to first degree black belt and the room erupted in cheers!  Wow!  I had goose bumps again.  Master Holloway stepped away for a moment at that point to retrieve our new black belt uniforms.  I turned to Jonathan, leaned down and asked him if I could give him a hug now (he wouldn’t let me earlier).  As he nodded without speaking, his face began to scrunch up into a cry and he buried his head into my arm for a hug and the happy tears fell.  I heard someone behind us say “those are happy tears!”  I knew it too.  He came up for a breath and came back in for a second hug.  Ahh.  I was a mom, a black belt mom, hugging her eleven year old black belt son, and I honestly can’t describe the feeling.  Overwhelming.  

We were handed our uniforms and were asked to go change as the rest of the group waited.  We came out onto the floor decked out in our crispy new white and black uniforms and marvelously new black belts to the whistles and smiles of our friends.  It is really hard not to have a crazy big smile on your face at that point.   

Lois was the last to be promoted, to fifth degree black belt.  An incredible end to our day.  In the company of wisdom, experience, and love.  Jonathan and I ran through the gauntlet of our peers for high fives and then a final “cha rutt kyung yet” facing the group.  Each of the new degreed black belts did the same.  Tradition.  Respect.  We took a lot of pictures afterward.  Great pictures, lots of smiles and hugs all around.  I can still feel each of those hugs today my friends.  Thank you.  

How will you make sure to enjoy the journey?

Do You Notice?

Do You Notice?

Do you stop and notice...

when as the sun breaks through the cloudy day, the little room you are furiously folding laundry in fills up with warm yellow light?

the pressure of the small hands around your waist when they reach in for a hug?

the color of the light of the full moon when it illuminates your whole back yard?

the fit of your fingers around your favorite coffee mug before you take your first morning sip?

the rhythm of your breath as you reach the top of the hill?

the sadness in your neighbor’s eyes as she smiles and passes by?

the way the warm breeze feels on your skin as you step out of the car?

Do you notice?

Do you stop and notice...

the smile on your dog when you scratch that place on his back?

the way the winter trees make an intricate black silhouette against that just blue morning sky?

how the empty sound of silence fills up your soul with clear new energy?

the tension in your body when you are thinking with worry?

when you are tired...and rest?

the tones of bird songs?

the miracle of life in everything around you?

What do you notice?

Earning Your Black Belt

Good morning!
Let's just say, well, I am excited...
I was working on some revisions of the Notebook this morning and wanted to share one of my favorite pages:  Tips on Earning Your Black belt

Tips for Earning Your Black Belt

The following tips came from the black belts that you train with in class!  They have been there and done that, so read their suggestions and practice...

• Learn your forms well!  As you advance in rank remember to practice the forms you learned for the previous belt as well as the new one you are learning.
• Learn the names of each fundamental move for each form.
• Don’t ignore details, like thumb in for a reverse knife hand strike, or tuck your fist completely into your side.
• Practice, Practice, Practice!
• Don’t just write stuff in your notebook.  REVIEW it often.
• Include new drills you learn in your notebook and review them by practicing.
• Get our there and compete.  Stepping into the ring, win or lose, makes you better.
• Learn to move in an “L” stance knife hand guarding block:  Start with the correct foot and arm position, looking at the angles of each.  Study it well.  Feel it by tightening and loosening the muscles, and by moving into and out of the position until you hit it every time.  This sequence should help you to concentrate and remember the position.
• Add some cross training, like running, to your fitness routine...it will help you build stamina for sparring.
• Work with those in lower ranks to help them, it will help you learn the forms better.
• When doing any or all of the above and especially during class, begin to see yourself as a black belt.
• You have to want this!  You can’t just expect it because you show up to class a lot and think you deserve it.

                      Lots of great tests!!

Slowing Down - Not What You Think

I bet you were ready for me to say something like, during this busy holiday time it is really important to slow down and breathe, take some time for yourself, make sure you aren't rushing to do everything, etc...

I read a blog a few days ago and I can't stop thinking about it.

http://chrisguillebeau.com/3x5/plenty-of-time/

Chris is giving us permission to speed up, giving us back up for the sense of urgency and purpose of our lives.  "There's Plenty of Time."  (But what if there's not?) says it all.

So I brought this topic up with a client yesterday and she agreed but she said that the rushing around during this time of year specifically ends up being meaningless.  The tasks we are rushing to do, the craziness of what we are cramming into our schedules, don't have meaning.  So the chaos is self imposed for no real reason except that we are trying to live up to some expectation of the perfect holiday.  Slowing down and remembering why we are celebrating might be a good idea, no matter what holiday you are celebrating.

But the blog goes beyond holiday celebration to talk about what we are doing with our lives.  The sense that if our lives matter, then we need to work on creating something that we can leave behind, that helps other people live well.  This is the speeding up that I am interested in. Specifically I am interested in living a life with passion, joy, creativity and good health that is aimed at helping people live with passion, joy, creativity and good health.  And I have a hard time with people telling me to slow down.  Always have.  Now finally someone is saying, "speed up!"  It's all good!

Thanks Chris.

Healing Moves 2012 is coming!

Vacation Healing

Wow, I haven't sat down to write in a while.  Had a fantastic vacation, the first "real" vacation in a long time.  My definition of real is when there is no cooking, cleaning, care taking, driving,  or laundry involved.  This was the first time in a long time that I actually forgot about reality for a while.  It wasn't until the second to last day that I remembered I had two dogs waiting for us to come home.  Oh my, those pina coladas were good.

And actually, it wasn't just the exotic drinks.  This trip with my family was especially great for me because, not having a to do list like the one above, I got to sink into the vacation moment with everyone and enjoy.  It was the music, dancing, wonderful meals, the sun and crystal blue water...  It was watching my kids with 24/7 smiles (well maybe 23/5, for those of you who know the whole story).

I told a few people that I even forgot about taekwondo, but just for the record, the group of people in the fitness room on Friday got to see all nine forms performed by me, on a rocking boat to boot!  I got a couple of interested looks, and no weird comments, which was nice.  My sister managed a great yoga pose along side of me, so we ended up being one of the best shows on the ship that day.


I am so grateful for the chance to take this trip with my family, for having the means to take it at all, and for the moments of relaxation and joy it brought.  I feel recharged, ready to dive into the chaotic holiday time that awaits, oh but wait, there is one little thing to do before that...

The black belt test!

I must focus...more later.

Positive Thinking

My friend Jill shared this video on Facebook this week.  I loved it and decided to share it again here:
http://youtu.be/qR3rK0kZFkg

When I watched the movie and read the book, "The Secret" by Rhonda Byrnes about six or seven years ago something clicked for me.  She was telling us that the power of positive thinking was real.  So real in fact that you could manifest positive results in your life by practicing it.  I found myself smiling, nodding my head, and taking notes that day.  I knew this was true.  I am not really sure how I knew, but I did.

Every day, every moment, we have a choice about the thoughts in our head, the words we say and the actions we take.  These thoughts, words and actions pave a path for us.  When we stay aware in our thoughts, words and actions then we have a choice to change them, to choose the ones that serve us, that serve our greatest good.  If we are checked out, unaware, unconscious, then something takes over.  I have heard this something called ego before in several books.  I am not sure if labeling it helps.  All I know is that if I check out, then some little voice in me takes over, and that voice is not always that helpful.  I have to check back in to turn it off.  I have to wake up and show up inside my own life, be aware.

The power of positive thinking is real.  We have to choose to practice it.  There are so many opportunities to go in the other direction.  So many things/people/events that bombard us with stress, negativity, suffering and pain.  We can choose to detach from these things and events, to not judge them or react to them, to stay positive, grounded, centered, and aware.

One of the worst things that ever happened to me career wise was being "let go" from a job.  My entire self esteem and worth was obliterated with that one sentence from my boss.  I was drowning in the negativity and stress of the situation.  Until I made a choice to pursue another path.  Thanks to that choice I was able to move on to become an owner of my own business.  I spent a lot of time torturing myself in my own head about why I was fired, what that meant about me and my skills, and why someone would do something like that to someone like me.  Looking back, all those moments spent in self doubt were a waste of time.  There was something bigger, better and healthier waiting in the wings.  I just couldn't detach from the negative thoughts.

I have heard people who label others as a Pollyanna.  I think the Pollyanna's of the world are on to something.

The Cutest Heating Pad Ever!

I recently met with a woman who I took a yoga class with long ago, Maggie Wong.  She teaches yoga at the Carderock Springs Swim and Tennis Club, which is where I will be starting my Therapeutic Exercise class in just a couple weeks.  Maggie is a very experienced yoga instructor and I recently learned that she is also a seamstress.

This is the "bed companion"

I will now be carrying her super cute animal print heating pads at Bodyworks!  This microwavable heating pad is larger than it might look in the picture, very comfortable around the neck, for the back or for the abdomen.  It comes in "giraffe", "cheetah", or "leopard" for $38.  Makes an awesome holiday gift!  I am working being able to sell through my website, but until then, email me if you would like to purchase one!

You will love having one of these during the cold winter months...

The Black Belt Notebook

I have been working on a project for my taekwondo class over the last several months and even though it will be a work in progress, with periodic updates, etc....I am happy to announce the Gentle East Black Belt Notebook!  The notebook will be available to belts red and higher who need to begin to gather information and study it to prepare for their black belt exam.  It covers all the basic information for belts white through red, kicks, forms, test requirements etc... and provides resources for teaching and testing.  Thanks to my classmates and teachers for being my inspiration for this project.  Email me to get your copy!

Crushed the Lawn Mower with my Car

Well, I was going to title this "Lack of Awareness" however this new title seems more catchy.  TP cleaned out the garage a little bit over the weekend and one of the things that was going out to the "curb" (these neighborhoods have grass strips, no sidewalks) was an old broken lawn mower.  It went out next to the garbage cans and the recycle bins for Monday morning pick up, only it didn't get picked up.  Once in a while we play "put it out there and see if they take it" roulette and mostly we win at this game, but this week we lost, and there it was all alone on my grass strip in front of the house.

So later that day I had an errand to run before rushing back to the house to take JP to his baseball practice.  I walked down my driveway staring at the old lawn mower that they rejected thinking that I would have to call for a special pick up and got in my car that was parked just behind it.  I then pulled forward into my driveway as usual so that I could turn around and head out Carteret Road...and I drove right over the lawn mower.  Realizing that I drove over it, I panicked and backed up over it too, and ripped my front license plate off the car.  Good news is I have a big enough car that that was the only damage (TP checked the underside of the car when he got home).  Wow, did I just run over the lawn mower?  Yep, yep I did.  Thank goodness this wasn't one of my kid's bikes.  Or the good mower...




I think that some things that we do day to day are so habitual that we do them without thinking.  Ha!  Understatement.  The deformed lawn mower got me thinking about what else I was doing, as routine, that I wasn't thinking about or bringing awareness to.  It got me thinking about what or who I might be running over in the process.

So today I am going to slow down a little and practice more awareness, and try not to run anything over.

Blogger's Elbow

I pretty much gave myself tendinitis this past month or so.  Tendinitis on the outside of your elbow is usually called tennis elbow (on the inside is golf elbow) but I am renaming it blogger's elbow because mine is from typing a lot.

Tendinitis is a tricky injury to have, mostly due to overuse of the body part that is hurting.  The muscle, after repeated contractions, causes its tendon (how the muscle connects to the bone) to be inflamed.  The inflammation of the tendon and the tightness of the muscle cause pain.  Many people with tendinitis aren't totally sure how they got it.  They say that the area just began to get irritated and then started to hurt, and then they couldn't use it without pain.  When tendinitis gets bad you begin to have difficulty lifting and carrying objects, turning door knobs, and even begin to have pain at rest.  Don't let your symptoms get this bad people!  If you have had soreness for a few days that doesn't seem to be going away by itself, go get treated and nip it in the bud.

In my last post "Where It Hurts Is Not The Problem" I explained how just because it hurts somewhere doesn't mean that that area is the root of the problem.  And so it goes for these tendinitis issues.  In the case of the elbow it is smart to look to the neck, shoulder and spine for restrictions that may have caused the muscles of the elbow to work harder than they were meant to work.

For tendinitis you can ice, massage, and gently stretch the muscles that are sore.  You can use an anti inflammatory cream such as Traumeel (see my older post) to help with the inflammation.   But rest is the order of the day for tendinitis.  If you keep using and aggravating the area, it will take longer for it to heal.  And begin to look to the other areas of your body that need attention, the neck, upper back and shoulder to be specific, but sometimes even the lower body needs to be loosened up.  Treating the whole body will help get rid of the injury and also help prevent new ones.